Nobody Touch My Poop

One of the great mysteries of parenthood? Why toddlers who are potty training become overly possessive about their poop. Seriously. You’d think we were flushing their puppy down the toilet. We had a nice little screaming session this morning because our boy didn’t want his mom to take the poop out of his big boy underwear. And he definitely didn’t want her to flush it down the toilet. He melted into a naked mess on the bathroom floor and then came back several times to visit his poop in the toilet after he’d calmed down.

He’s not alone. I know other toddlers with the same sense of attachment. One dad tried to get to the bottom of the mystery by reasoning with his child, asking him a series of very logical questions. The result of the Socratic discussion was this: his boy likes the color brown.

Very logical.

I’m sure there is plenty of child development research that would tell me exactly why kids turn their poop into a friend. Maybe I’ll look them up later. In the meantime, I’m choosing to focus on the positive indicators of this new development. If nothing else, it shows my kid is loyal, even to feces. You gotta respect that. Never leave a man behind. Even if that man is poop.

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2 thoughts on “Nobody Touch My Poop

  1. Wow, never had this problem in our house. Though I do remember being very attached to my dirty bathwater as a child. My mom actually had to draw a diagram of how the water left the tub, went through the pipes, entered the septic field, traveled through the soil, and went back down to our well where it was picked up for future baths. After that, I was never sad to see my bathwater go down the drain… but I was terminally grossed out on drinking water from the tap. It’s been nothing but beer ever since.

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